RISING: Red Sox trade options

Miguel Tejada!  Hanley Ramirez!  Jhonny Peralta!  Chita Rivera!  With Lugo being Lugo and Lowrie being injured this thread has scared up a dozen potential shortstops to be had in trade for one of our dozen grade-A prospects plus the suddenly expendable Brad Penny.  There is even a Kayson Gabbard-for-Alex Gonzalez scenario thrown in.

Key Line:  "Omar Vizquel."  --D Jack's Dome

FALLING:  The Lester Elephant In The Room

 Can we all agree that "Elephant In The Room" is to SoSH 2009 what "sploogefest" was to SoSH 2004?  And can we all agree that if everyone is willing to talk about something, and talk at length about something, and throw up evidence, counter-examples and faux outrage about something, then the elephant analogy doesn't work at all?  At least the Ortiz "Elephant in the Room" thread title made sense, since the Papi in his road uniform does bear resemblance to a pachyderm.

 Key Line:  "Certainly some of it is luck. His FIP is under 5 and his xFIP is under 4."  --amarshal2

 FALLING:  Rick Pitino Blackmail

 Speaking of thread titles, it is hard to screw up a thread called "Rick Pitino Blackmail" but the College Sports forum is doing its darnedest.  If only we had Main Board standards across the other forums.  Somebody would be bringing the stats on the blackmailer, a scouting report on Pitino's off-the-court performance, and at least three "x is not walking through that door" jokes.  Success is a choice, people.    

 Key Line:  "Sex."  --pdaj